Thank You to My Readers

The year is coming to a close...this week. I have just learned I have people around the world reading my blog. Amazing!!! You all make me feel so special I want to hug you all and say thank you!!!! I started writing my blog as a class project in my Basic Reporting class at Hunter College. So for me it was a hobby but then as time has passed it has become in weaved into my life and the many chapters past, present, and future. I love writing and I love that I get to tell people about my stories and thoughts.
Honey Brown Sugar allows me to do that  with this blog...I try to help,educate, give advice, and share everything going on in my world. My story will continue to be more interesting I promise. I will also include more news-related stories too. But for now, you get to learn about little me...a girl from jersey city who recently moved back to new york to find herself, start a new life,
And make her dreams come true.
2012 feels like its going to be really exciting and fun I have a lot up my sleeve so my dear readers I thank you for sticking in their with me as I continue on my career as a journalist, a producer, writer, a young twenty something woman, and most of all "Honey Brown Sugar"...stay tuned there's always more to share.
Happy Holidays!!!! Have a Beautiful New Year. Thank you so much

"Learning to accept the truth in my heart"

something is bugging me maybe I need to accept that this person may not be the man I want him to be. With him its like a coin toss heads you're in my heart  and on my mind. This sounds crazy but the other night I was reading this article just for fun.  Called 10 signs of when you're in love. Funny right? well as I read along everything made sense and became clear to me.
Yeah I am and its time for me to accept and cannot deny I am in love with this person. Yet we haven't done things the proper way though...
I am actually a traditional, hopeless romantic with a creative flair for showing my love to people I adore and whole dear to my heart.
For him dinner at a five star restaurant would be ideal, a ride through central park in a horse and carriage  ride.
I want to take him to clubs, new broadway shows, vacations to places I have always dreamed of too. Taking him to concerts you know I feel like I have been losing myself a bit....The things I used to do were fun maybe its because of funds. But one thing he will know about me my ideas never end and my goals always get accomplished.
Now aside from that I cannot pressure him....I know how he feels about me certain ways.
Yet I don't want this to be a physical connection only. I am better than that!
I don't even want to date anyone else....doesn't that sound weird. I just want to be with him now. But I have to see how he really feels though...and if he really wants me. 

Christmas Memories

I had a blast this week I was mainly by myself but there is something magical about being here in New York around Christmas time. So many people come here from all over the world to spend time with their families and friends. I think I fell in love with new york again.
It was so much fun being here this week watching the tourists at the windows being amazed by the department store displays on Fifth Avenue.

Christmas always brings back happy memories when I was a little girl my mom brought me books called "Twelve Days of Christmas". she also brought me my first bible too. I remember that book cause that was how I learned all the Christmas songs. I am happy that I had those experiences being able to sing songs in my catholic schools and public school in washington, dc. Living in jersey going to catholic school learning all of these songs and the power of the message of God and the story. It hits home now.
I have so many funny memories of Christmas....discovering my mom ate the chocolate chip cookies and egg nog. Buying Christmas presents, and even one year a Charlie Brown Christmas tree.
So for me its always full of happy memories and so much. I have a lot of people who I adore and have blessed me over my twenty-five year journey.
This will be my 25th Christmas so I am excited its like a big party I get to be with a lot of people who I adore. It would be good to have the whole family or crew with us.
However I am building beautiful memories. Here are some photos of my christmas city shots 2011

Major big things in 2011

I cannot believe just how much happened in my life this year....I just realized that quite a lot has happened its amazing. A lot has changed I was listening to someone say big things in life can change your life. A lot has happened though I left my job...I was about to fall in love with this one guy but it never worked out he just wasn't the one...another guy just didn't have it but he and I will always be friends.  When I left my job in January I did not realize just how much was getting ready to change. I knew leaving was right for me. I was in the wrong industry....but at the same time something prepared me. That experience prepared me though working at a small law firm I believe prepared me on how to manage my time, how to work independently, and also keep structure. Also enjoy life and to really appreciate the finer things too.
So leaving there was no bad terms....I left because I was ready to follow my dream. Next change came was my mom telling me we would move....We moved September 25, 2011 we moved to New York. Now we have lived in new york but never manhattan. So its a new experience. For me living in Manhattan now its good it really is I feel settled like now everything will fall into place.
So I found a new job with the help of my family and power of social media connections. It all worked out beautifully really. I was home mostly looking for my dream job. So its been a blessing.
Next big change was on a deeper level...the loss of some special people I think I learned now enjoy every moment. Have fun...keep doing and achieving your goals. Keep living and achieving what I have always wanted....The next big change was meeting 6 amazing people who will be a big part of my life professionally and personally.
Another major thing for me was learning how to really feel comfortable with me....opening up again. Taking some major risks....so 2011 changed me a lot inside . I took some big steps to become better and I believe these decisions will be good for me.
I met someone who when I am around makes me sooooo giddy and happy.. I miss him when he is not around me. So that is always good. It makes me realize now all that time I took to myself paid off. It feels really good. I believe 2012 will be exceptional too...there is still so much for honey brown sugar to do and share also. I am excited!!!! Cannot wait let the parties and journey continue on too. Honey Brown Sugar has more in store. 

Need to Clarify Some Things

I need to clarify some things.....I have so many emotions running through my body, a thousand thoughts in my head, and my instincts are like damn....what do I do now? I don't want to play games, I don't want to be childish. I want to ddevelop something special with this man. I know we have the potential to get there.
I don't just want the physical with him. its about a genuine connection. I am happy with him. I can accept he is far from perfect , I can accept his vices, but one thing I cannot lie someone up on the man I want. Ever since I was girl I always wanted the man everyone else always did.
Now that I am an adult that has not changed....I have had a lot of experiences and now I realize I want to be with someone who wants what I want too.
The man I am dating "handsomeness"...he and I have a incredible connection...his taste in music, his dreams, he asked me something I never had a man ask me so fast " How many children do you want?" I said "four"....I cannot deny it...there would be no other man I would desire to have children with  he has a high rank. every other boy or man I liked or loved I just know it would never work ever. I have had some of my boyfriends tell me I want you to hve my children. But for the first time....There's nothing wrong with the man I am interested in that could complain about. He is beautifully imperfect, he is intelligent, funny, silly, talented, sexy, and he has a lot to bring to the table.
We have known each other now it will be a year in april. I have started dating him probably june..we didn't get real serious not until now which is six months. there was no other person I adore...when the earthquake hit in manhattan this summer. the only man I thought of besides my parents and family was him. that funny? It made me realize I adore him soooo much. I still do....we will see stay tuned always more inside the world of honey brown sugar.

I've been getting tested with life

lol...I have been getting tested with a lot of things lately its crazy cause I have always been calm and strong with things. Now  lately I have been more vulnerable though I think cause a lot of things have  been making me feel that way. I hate letting my guard down cause I am really protective of myself. I usually keep everything to myself but now....I feel like a lot of things have let down my inner protection and emotions. I do not like showing that side but now I guess my human side is coming out. I think ever since my  uncle passed it has brought my dad's side of the family and I closer. it  also has let my dad seen different sides of my personality too lol. So now it makes me realize I am stronger than what I think I am. I gotta remember that....I  have had so much on my mind. I have been losing sight of who I am and what I have learned in this city too. I guess cause a lot has been clouding my judgment.
Now I need to remember who I am I can make it through anything if I just calm down....breathe...say what's on my mind. A lot of people have been testing me and I am trying hard not too break. I have to remember why I am here and why this happened to get my mom and my life in order. Also to continue to do what my mission is too. become a journalist...share my story....and make my dream come true. Continue my friendships find new ones....and develop professional relationships. also develop a healthy relationship with handsomeness too.

Getting to know "Handsomeness"

I call him "Handsomeness" because he truly is so beautiful. He has been asking to spend time with me and its been a blessing actually for me. Like everything I ever wanted and have been literally dreaming of is coming true. I am happy so happy to be in this place where there's no judgment....I can be myself. I am making a new friend and I am also sooooo attracted to him inside and out. He makes me realize no one is perfect that flaws can be beautiful too. You can enjoy a flaw about a person that others may disapprove of too. Not until you know them and spend time with them. I guess I need to thank timing, my opportunities, prayer, and my heart. I followed my heart this time and my mind. I know what I am getting into and no matter what I love that its happening at this point in my life. I need and do deserve love happiness and a person to make me smile. I feel so good about him cause he just has something special in his smile and heart. He"s going to make me a better person and woman too. This time I have to step up I do not care about the other guys in my past......I am done. They will soon have to acknowledge  my family and friends. There isn't anyone else I want around me those guys were apart of me for a reason. Now I feel like this man.... Handsomeness is going to allow me to grow with him, unveil more, and now I can share my life with a new best friend. Stay tuned folks....always more to come

Coming into my new yorkness

3 months ago we moved here and I can tell you life has kicked up a few notches and I see that in the end this move was for the best. Although I have so much to do still financially to get on track. New york life and living in manhattan agrees with me and feels good to be here. I am glad that everything is falling into place and there are a lot of great things ahead. That makes me excited I am relying a lot on faith in God and just really believing that in the end he is the one who controls and has a plan in mind too. New york has always been a special part of my life....professionally its coming together....spiritually I am finding which direction is for me....physically I am learning to take better care of my body now even more...you can stretch a dollar and still be healthy. Personally...I am getting there I need to find new girlfriends and more people. I always cherish my friendships from my past they are my sisters. However building new friendships is good....I am going to build a better relationship w/my brother, and I see  a lot of goodness coming. One thing l have learned how to make it through anything. If you can make it here you will get thru anything

When Life Hits You....it gives you a wake up call

I have been busy this past week and a half really learning the truth of life, love, and why we as humans get such an amazing gift. My uncle who is my father's brother passed away this past November. November sometimes can be a crazy month for me as far as my birthday goes always good but November has a lot of significance with me because now I have lost two people in that month my baby brother, Michael and my uncle, Juan Cortez Riccardo the third he was born June 1st, 1951 and he was called Junie. He passed November 18, 2011 from a long battle with lukemia, congestive heart failure, a battle with his kidneys. He was an amazing man though and I wish we could have had more time together and laughs. I am happy I had a chance to get to know him and hear his stories. We actually have a lot in common more than our last name. We like the finer things in life, we appreciate beauty of nature and vibrant things too. I love that and we also don't judge people we love with our hearts hard and give all we can. One thing I will cherish going to visit my family opened my eyes completely! Now I see stick close to family and friends do everything you want to do and enjoy,enjoy....even ifyou're not a millionaire take care of yourself and treat it like la dolce vita...its so precious. I dedicate this blog entry to all of those who have passed this year Randy, Mikey, Nora, Uncle Jewel, Sandy, Eddie K, my dads Aunt Roberta, and last my uncle Junie lord please be with all of the families and friends of these people.