I've been getting tested with life

lol...I have been getting tested with a lot of things lately its crazy cause I have always been calm and strong with things. Now  lately I have been more vulnerable though I think cause a lot of things have  been making me feel that way. I hate letting my guard down cause I am really protective of myself. I usually keep everything to myself but now....I feel like a lot of things have let down my inner protection and emotions. I do not like showing that side but now I guess my human side is coming out. I think ever since my  uncle passed it has brought my dad's side of the family and I closer. it  also has let my dad seen different sides of my personality too lol. So now it makes me realize I am stronger than what I think I am. I gotta remember that....I  have had so much on my mind. I have been losing sight of who I am and what I have learned in this city too. I guess cause a lot has been clouding my judgment.
Now I need to remember who I am I can make it through anything if I just calm down....breathe...say what's on my mind. A lot of people have been testing me and I am trying hard not too break. I have to remember why I am here and why this happened to get my mom and my life in order. Also to continue to do what my mission is too. become a journalist...share my story....and make my dream come true. Continue my friendships find new ones....and develop professional relationships. also develop a healthy relationship with handsomeness too.