“Life with Honey Brown Sugar”: My twenties
All right my readers I have got a
great idea I wanted to discuss with you all and maybe you will relive some of
your best memories and also will inspire you to keep on enjoying the remainder
of your twenties and of course your thirties, forties, and beyond. I use my
blog of course not only to inform, educate, discuss different topics, and for
entertainment. I also use it, as many of my readers know discuss my real life.
I am honest and open with all of you because I feel like the many thousands of
you who read my blog know this is a journey. I hope I get the opportunity and
privilege to discuss many more stories happening in my life, the world, the
news, and so much more. I actually found and started this blog when I was 21
going on 22 it was a couple weeks from my Twenty-second birthday (Oct 22, 2008)
is the day I made my very first post. It has become a digital scrapbook of
times in my life that have taught me to be stronger, braver, more creative,
smarter, wiser, and a more well rounded person too. So let’s talk about your twenties. All right here we go when
I turned 18 on November 06, 2004. I was thrilled and very excited I had just
celebrated my birthday with my family and old friends actually. I wish I had
the blog when I first started college cause you really would have learned a
whole bunch of things even more about me back then. I started college, as you
know when I was 17 going on 18 at Bergen Community College. So I spent the
majority of my time of course working on my Associates degree in Journalism and
much more. I want to start from my
late teens and then go into my twenties cause you all will see the progression
and also how important it really is to get your education, find your passion,
and pursue your dreams even when challenges come along. So yes I started at Bergen Community
College and I had a tough choice deciding on Music Business or Journalism would
be the two choices I had to decide on for college. Of course you all know I
chose the latter. Now let me get in my college days. I was excited, nervous; it
was new and of course unfamiliar. Now what you didn’t know was this I literally
had 2 weeks to hurry up and get into a college. It was so late I remember I had
to choose fast and quickly which college to go to right away. My high school
GPA needed improvement it would have been higher. For me in high school (I
attended Academy of Sacred Heart for a year and then Cathedral High School in
New York City, NY). I struggled with Mathematics I had tutors who helped me and
my teachers did too. My GPA was
not the best it could have been a 3.0 or 4.0 believe me but back in the day I
didn’t master prioritize, organize, and time management. I became much better
at it in college. My first few
years in college I have another confession I had to take remedial classes in
Mathematics and English! Ahhhh I know but in order for me to get a move and
start this was the only way. I was supposed to go to and attend BMCC (Borough
of Manhattan Community College) but God had other plans in mind. So I attended
and started my classes at Bergen Community College. Here’s the bonus though I got to take these classes well one
of them with my dear friend, Marisa (yes she was in my English class and it was
the best). We passed obviously and went on to take the other classes that were
necessary. I am going to tell you
all when you are in college (for my younger college age readers) it’s a
struggle, a journey, you are learning true independence and self-reliance. I
had to develop those character traits fast and quick to make sure I would be
stronger and ready. College is as they say 25% Social 25% Mental, and 50% of
what you learn while you are in class so listen up Mentally you are challenged
especially for students who are full-time. So that is something that I can
definitely stress to people. One tip take advantage of socializing with people
who you may not even be that close with too. It is all beneficial and great for
you to do because it will pay off in the end. I first came there and it was Macaroni
(Marisa) and Me lol. Although she wasn’t there the whole duration, having her
by my side definitely broke the ice and allowed me to be comfortable and ease
into the school. It is a gorgeous well kept suburban campus but also very diverse
and full of people from all walks of life and backgrounds too. The one thing I can say when you are in
your late teens, finding yourself, surround yourself with people who are on the
same page as you, don’t be afraid to take chances, and open yourself to things
that you may say “no” to as well.
From 2004-2005 was my freshman year
and it was a great time for both of us, we really got to see who was on campus,
which would teach us as well. This was a great time for me because this was the
year I would take my first trip across the seas to Italy. That was my first
trip and I enjoyed it learning Italian and the country. At the time my friend and her mother invited me. It would
have been nice to attend with my college but this was completely separate. Talk
about your eyes being open. Everything for me was new, I think that time of my
life for me was great, I can just tell you we had too much fun, a camcorder,
camera, tons of pictures, and some of the best memories. My tips for college
students if you choose to be an exchange student, take advantage of the trips
given to you in college. I promise they will open major doors for you. It will
make you not only appreciate America but also expose you to everything around
the world too. This was also
around the time I think I may have went to my first nightclub as well. We
(Marisa, her then boyfriend, his friends, and I all went to a nightclub way up
near Nanuet, NY why do I remember this because it was freezing like an icicle. My friends and I all had to be around
18-20 back then. Right before we could actually drink during that time. Going
to a nightclub you see half-naked women in the club dancing was very new for me
but nothing new though. We adjusted to that nightclub and that was the
beginning of many nights partying in nightclubs and lounges. I met a couple
guys on campus but nothing serious happened yet. I also did work at a radio station as an office assistant. I
started working for LA MEGA June 30, 2004. I worked in the account executive
and sales department. I started
working there right after high school. I worked there I believe until about
late December of 2005.
2005-2006 was my sophomore year of
college you can say, I was well on my way fitting in and getting adjusted oh
did I tell you I traveled 2 ½ hours by the way to get out on campus. Yes I
traveled by bus taking a minibus or the 86 BUS from Newport Centre Mall I used
to live down the street so I would wake up every morning walk down and take the
bus then take the 163 bus to Bergen Community College. I couldn’t afford a car
at the time so traveling for me was a great option. Talk about seeing all walks
of life. I was exposed to a whole lot believe me. When I arrived back on campus
this was a great time for me, it allowed me to know for sure what I wanted to
do plus I was just working for a radio station as well as an office assistant. So
yes it was a lot happening during that time. One point I want to remind you all
that yes you can and you’re capable of multi-tasking. So I traveled between
doing the job in the city and going to class full time. It was a lot to take in
back then. I had to learn to priortize. The library in college became my best
friend. It was the only place I could sleep, I could focus, and study. Also if
I needed to meet a group as well it became a place for all of us to really
learn from not only our professors but each other. A lot of people helped me
back then.
(AGES 19-21) FALL 2006- SPRING
2007-Third year at Bergen Community College my last year I remember this time
very well cause this was when I met one man who I thought I may come to spend
the rest of my life with too. I remember this year very well. He was 29 going
on 30 we are about 9 years apart. It didn’t work out I am just going to tell
you it’s two reasons. One he wanted children and so did I. two I was too young
back then, I still needed to get myself together. We both wanted a big family
of about 3 or 4 children back then.
So it just wasn’t the right time. Okay so I decided when I got back to
college I was going to take more control, become better in my classes, really
show them what I am made of and who I am as well. I really wanted to showcase
and show the people on campus what I was made of as well. I remember this time
of my life well I had a great summer actually. I had just come back from
vacation at Martha’s Vineyard with my family; this was going to be my last year
on campus. I had really come to enjoy my school and being there. I really
discovered myself at this time. I had to join the student newspaper called,
“The Torch”. I remember being so nervous and my professor had to reassure me
that everything would be all right and I would fine. I walked into the Torch
newspaper office September of 2006 and I asked two people who I would become
good friends with as well. November 06, 2006- I turned 20 years old and everything in my
world kind of became more defined. I was dating even more people during this
time I was meeting all different types of guys. Men from all different types of backgrounds, ethnicities, and lifestyles. I also met one man who I kind
of fell in love with as well. He was almost 10 years older than me he was about 29 going on 30 and I was 19 going on 30. I met him in my Contemporary Moral Issues class at the time. The lesson there is you can date someone who is older than you but you need to look at the long term. What they are really asking for as well.
I met some of the best people I got to know and learn from as well at my newspaper. Anyway, I got to the office and my life changed I got paid $25 dollars per article I wrote and if I made the headline I was paid $100.00 dollars. Now of course this wasn’t a lot of money but I am telling you at this time of my life it was well worth it. I had some of the best memories, traveling to River Park, New York going to our retreat at the Hilton Hotel and having fun with my staff members of the student newspaper. They who are all incredibly talented and went on to do many great things. We also had other retreat to the Catskills as well called a leadership retreat. I look back and yes those memories were some of the most challenging and busy times. I did an internship at Universal Music Group in the Roc A Fella records division for my college credit, and then the next chapter of my life began…I entered Hunter College on August 27, 2007 I began my classes and entered in.
I met some of the best people I got to know and learn from as well at my newspaper. Anyway, I got to the office and my life changed I got paid $25 dollars per article I wrote and if I made the headline I was paid $100.00 dollars. Now of course this wasn’t a lot of money but I am telling you at this time of my life it was well worth it. I had some of the best memories, traveling to River Park, New York going to our retreat at the Hilton Hotel and having fun with my staff members of the student newspaper. They who are all incredibly talented and went on to do many great things. We also had other retreat to the Catskills as well called a leadership retreat. I look back and yes those memories were some of the most challenging and busy times. I did an internship at Universal Music Group in the Roc A Fella records division for my college credit, and then the next chapter of my life began…I entered Hunter College on August 27, 2007 I began my classes and entered in.
FALL 2007- SPRING 2008
This was a hard time for me
readjusting back to New York, readjusting to a new commute, readjusting to a
new school, it was challenging, on one hand it was one of those times I knew I
was on my way to a new journey. There were moments I was really alone too. I
didn’t have my people around me anymore now I was on my own to work on my
education, focus on my plans as well. I can tell you this time of my life was
the most challenging time ever. This was when I really learned you are going to
have to put your “Big Girl Shoes” now. I remember in 2008 I was looking for work. I was pretty
tenacious about this one job. I use that word cause I remember one of the
staffing counselors told me “You’re one of the most tenacious people I have
ever met.” I was pretty flattered it meant a lot to me. I took that to heart. I
started with Kelly Services Staffing in New York on June 12, 2008.
My college days…I was really to
myself cause I knew during that time I wanted to focus but that wasn’t for long
though. I met someone who was going to not only change my life in a way,
inspire me, but also show me my real value as well. I met one friend of mine
gave me an opportunity to write. He did become one of my close friends. I think
without him I really wouldn’t have gone on to learn about some of the people who
would open doors for me. Now although we may not have connected romantically.
He did provide me with opportunities and experiences that helped me through
some rough patches. I just started
at Hunter College I was meeting a lot of different people and it was a great
time. I was happy to be in a diverse environment again. I was around people
from all backgrounds. So that’s something I have always been used to actually. My biggest challenge I will never
ever forget though. I was in college and taking my classes. Then I get thrown
with preparing for an exam that would become apart of my life for the next two
years. The CPE (CUNY Proficiency
Exam) of New York is an exam for college students attending an CUNY University
and have to show their writing, critical thinking, ideas, and opinions in a
reading and writing exam. It took me so long to get this exam. Not only that I
was struggling to get my job life together, manage my money financially, and so
much more. It was overwhelming but I really tried to look at everything as a
challenge. I couldn’t give up, it was challenging for me but I don’t believe I
was taken it as seriously as I should have the first time. So it took a few
times to really get it. As I said I had a lot of things going on at home, in
school, personally, and was trying to get things on track too.
2008-2009 (Ages 22-23)
My second year at Hunter College
was pretty good I felt more confident this was one of the best times because it
was 2008 the year that President Obama was running for office. I was sporting
my Obama buttons (I still have them) in support all over my backpack. The only
thing about this year all though it was a great year for me. Financially I
learned the biggest lesson ever. Whatever you do in college it doesn’t matter
what university you attend. Do not I repeat do not fall behind half-time and
skip getting your financial aid ready for college. I remember feeling horrible
I couldn’t attend school for about 2 months actually. So I just hung around
home. Yes I didn’t live on campus. I was accepted to Hampton University (I
planned to attend and accepted to Hunter College). I had to go to Hunter
because financially it was still a struggle. I would have gone believe me if I
had the money. So in the mean time I was looking for work, and trying to get
back on track. January rolled around and things were so much better. My social
life was very busy during this time; I was dating a lot of people around this
time, traveling to see friends and family. I also was
planning and wanted to join a sorority too. I became interested and planned to be apart of trying to
keep a float with my college life as well. I remember the big shows that were
on TV that year was “Jersey Shore” I remember this was one of the biggest shows
that hit the MTV airwaves cause I was always watching it. I remember during
this time I was trying to find my way so I can get on a better path. This was
the year I also went to Las Vegas and had a great ole fabulous time. Some of
you can read some of my journey on the blog too. Just go back to the archives
August 2009.
(Ages 23-24): 2009-2010
In the Fall of 2009 this was going
to be my last semester, things were still very challenging during this time,
financially for everyone. I remember this was the year everything would finally
fall into place for me. I remember I was multitasking like no ones business. I
am serious I was multitasking and running so much I lost about 10 pounds
actually from running between New York and New Jersey. Yes I was literally
running. I am serious. I was taking the PATH train, which was also one of my
dear best friends seriously. It
wasn’t just a train for me…for me not only was it one of my sources of
transportation but it was apart of me. I also took the Subway as well. I think that Path train was really a big
part of my life especially these college years. I hardly take the Path train
now except if I happen to be heading into New Jersey to visit my friends. I
plan on driving hopefully very, very soon. I have always had my permit since
2006 actually. I just needed the car, money to practice too. I took that train
probably for about 14 years from when I first moved to Jersey City until the
day I moved. The PATH train was
one block away from my apartment in Newport. So I was very lucky easy to get
home, to work, and school. So anyway I was frequently traveling because I had
kind of three jobs at one time it seemed like in a way. One job of course was
completing my Media Studies degree I focused primarily on Print Journalism and
Broadcast Journalism. Second job I
had a part-time job which would later become full-time at a law firm that one
of my old friends worked at and she referred me and got me the opportunity of
working in Hoboken, NJ for about 2 ½ years. I started on April 30, 2009. That
job changed my life, how I felt about life as well, and it-opened doors for me.
It not only gave me a new sense of independence as a young woman, my life
started to fall into place, and also I felt comfortable cause I had my friends
along the way. However, although things were falling into place, financially it
was still challenging this was at the height of the economy crisis too. So
there were a lot of lessons to be learned. I had to learn how to balance my
money financially. One other great thing that happened during this time I
passed that CPE exam I told you about. I also found love during this time too.
I had fell in love again and I had to really learn how to balance it all and
manage everything else. This was also when my blog for me was taking off too.
It was an incredible time although the man I was dating and I are no longer dating.
We are still good friends and that’s all right with me. So 2009 was a big year for me actually
and my family as well. Oh I didn’t tell you how I got my first credit card now
for young people. Yes we are young, we need and we want certain things to keep
up with times. I promise you get a credit card only for three reasons 1.
Emergencies, 2. To save money, 3. To build credit when you are 100 percent
ready. You often get about three years or so before your credit card expires. So
I suggest you take your time. Me when I got this card believe me I didn’t want
this card. This little black plastic card changed my life in some ways but it
also taught me a valuable lesson, which I am teaching you all. Hold on to the
card, if you know you’re a spender (have a loved one hold it for you until it’s
a true emergency). This will help you believe me. I am grateful for this card
if I didn’t have it I wouldn’t have been able to go on one of the best
vacations of my life. Pay for my luxurious Trump International Hotel room \in
Las Vegas, Nevada. I wouldn’t have been able to give my mother a cake for her
50th birthday party that year for about 100 people. So yes credit cards are seductive and
dangerous like that but you will be paying for it in the long run too. My advice
hold on to that credit card, or if you really are not that strong or
responsible with money. My advice tell them “no”.
(Ages 24-Age 25)
2010-2011
2010 was another one of the biggest years of my life this
was the year that I was really traveling like crazy. I was still working for my
boss in Hoboken, New Jersey as a real estate law administrative assistant. My boss and I became really close
actually he helped me even when I had to do an interview for my college class,
“Interviewing Techniques”. So he always took care of me, breakfast on Fridays,
blueberry, cinnamon apple muffins, egg sandwiches, I got bonuses, Godiva
chocolates, and more. My life
working there was really good and he understood I was chasing a big dream as
well. I was not only working there I started my internship for Shovio
Broadcasting in January 2010 and worked in downtown Manhattan on West 38th
street. As I was completing my internship for college credit I also focused on
my classes, my load was light, very light. I probably had about four or three
classes my last year and I made it out. I would graduate from Hunter College on
June 3, 2010 at the beautiful and world famous, Radio City Music Hall. I
remember telling someone I wanted my own show, they asked me what do you want
to do after college with your degree? I wanted to discuss different topics. I
had a big plan still do. I also continued writing my blog, and many other
things. This time in life was fun, exciting I was exposed to a lot during my
internship for my Media Studies degree, you get to see how production really
works, and how the television production and internet business works as well.
This opportunity I believe was one that would open up a huge door for me. I
continued working and desperately wanted to follow my passion of writing,
media, and many other creative fields. Shovio Broadcasting was internship I did where television
hosts connect with their fans via Internet. They can call in, type messages,
and watch the show. I was Star and BucWild’s who is Star & BucWild? They were formerly on Hot 97 morning
show but have been on the radio I believe back in Philly and Vladtv as well. I
was their intern for about 4 months and it was definitely one of the moments
you don’t want to forget. Now the
spring of 2011 was a really important year for me I had to make some important
decisions. I loved my job in Hoboken but I also felt that I loved media and I
eagerly wanted to get started. I felt this need to break away from my job and
wanted to take a chance. I would be working in the office some days and then I
would take a lunch break focus on my blog and writing. I grew a deep passion
for it because I had so many topics to discuss. I would have to rush sometimes
but if my boss ever knew this just know I was following my calling, didn’t mean
to slack on anything, he knew that I wanted to be a writer and whether that was
working for a magazine, producing, reporting, it was important to me. I am glad
I did this actually. I told him November of 2010 I would resign from my job. It
was really difficult, I didn’t want to leave, I loved the staff we had two
lawyers working, and the people visiting us as well. The only thing that
prevented me at that time was just realizing if I didn’t leave the job I was
going to be stuck there. I wouldn’t follow my passion; I left the job on
January 7, 2011. I remember being completely heartbroken. I didn’t want to but
I had to though. If I didn’t it wasn’t going to be good for any of us. I left
and 3 months later I stayed home looking for jobs, helping around the house, of
course still helping my mother. About a month or so later she decided that we
would move. I think this is when I learned the true lesson of what’s important,
what’s valuable. Of course family always is I had some really tough choices to
make that year. I would leave my home, the home where I really grew up at from
age 10-age 24. I left Jersey City on September 24, 2011 and moved back to New
York. In a way it worked out because I was able to not only work and join Black
Enterprise Magazine. I joined their television broadcast team and this became a
huge part of my life. This was the first time I got to feel like I was heading
into the right direction. It was a part-time job paid internship but I loved
every moment of it. Whenever we
would go on vacation or hiatus I would also do temp assignments to fill the gap
too. The job was a good
opportunity for me to be around people who all had the same passion. Whenever
all 7 of us came together in our conference room it was a great experience
because it taught me how to produce, how to write, connect, and be really
detail-oriented as well. That’s one memory I will never forget.
(25-26)
2011-2012
So as I settled into my life here
in New York City I also became a volunteer in January of 2011 with New York
Cares I love all of their programs and they also added a huge balance to my
life. It was about chasing dreams but I think it gave me a real sense of
humility and reminded me it’s okay to a good person. 2012, I continued with my internship.
The blog continued to take off, and as we know I not only became a volunteer
for New York Cares, I volunteered with Obama’s 2012 campaign. It taught me
about giving back always makes a huge impact on everyone’s lives. I met a lot
of people. I stayed in Washington,
DC for about 2 months looking for a job and actively volunteering as well. I
loved it I met so many people from all backgrounds they touched my life and I
hope I did with them too.
(26-27)
2012-2013
In early October I joined a newspaper as a contributing
writer. I do plan to submit more pieces one day. In late October of 2012 I came
back to New York during this time I tried to get my job back as well. I came back in the beginning of 2013
and assisted them. I did leave in 2013 and focused on other opportunities. I
worked on finding new jobs. My twenties during this time I think allowed me to
just have fun. For some reason I feel like I got in trouble during this time I
was sort of rebelling for some reason. I don’t know I wanted to prove somehow I
was capable of holding my own. I tried to break out. I got my belly button
pierced during this time. I started experimenting more with my hair. I still do
actually. I found other odd jobs a lot of people helped me during this time. I
joined a marketing company and started doing promotions as well. Of course the
blog was still always there for me to carry on. My blog is sort of like my
release to get everything out. I rekindled friendships during this time and I
also was doing a lot of traveling as well getting back to working for my
staffing agencies. I think this was when I really started thinking about the
future as well. A lot happened to me during this time in my life I think made
me appreciate a lot of things. It made me want to figure out what I wanted to
do as a young woman and what kind of woman did I want to be as well.
(27-28)
2013 into 2014 for me was a great time as I said I was
actively working during this period traveling. I became a better professional.
I think I also just wanted to move forward as well. Move into the direction of
having what I always dreamed of as well.
I accomplished a lot during 2014, I started working for my marketing
company on a consistent basis, I achieved success with my blog and became more
versatile in media, my goals became bigger, I started really focusing and
paying attention to them. 2014 was a big year for me. So much really happened
actually. It’s a lot of me to
discuss, but I will tell you one thing, I accomplished great things, with New
York Cares, with the blog, and personally I am truly grateful.
(28-29)
2014-2015
What am I going to do in my last year of my twenties I will
be 29 in November. It is now 2015,
I still work for my staffing agencies doing many assignments, So I am apart of
4 technically but plan to join more, I am signed with Kelly Services Staffing
Winston Staffing, Jennifer Temps, and Page Personnel staffing. I will continue
with my marketing promotions for the Hart Agency hopefully this summer, my
writing, I plan for this year to make this blog an even better success, I plan
to hopefully start the next chapter of my life, I would love to settle down
very soon just putting it out there.
My biggest goal for 2015 is a full-time position whether media or an
administrative position that’s the biggest goal, I hope to move into my bought
and owned apartment (technically the apartment I live in is half-mine, I take
care of it of course) not just for the sake of independence but Honey Brown
Sugar would like to be a wife and mom one day to her fine hubby and little many
brown sugar babies lol so that’s one big dream, I plan on finish writing a few
books I am working on a lot believe me.
I plan to continue to work and write: a biography, a few fictional
stories: young adult and I wrote one book about a beautiful African American
fairy I completed back in 2012 actually I hope to get it published that is a
children’s book, a cook book full of delicious, healthy, and creative family
recipes from my mother, my family members, and myself that I have grown up
with, that are traditional,
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| This picture I know was definitely taken when I was about 19 going on 20. Lol Love my tan lol! Summer 2006 |
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| At home February 2015 |
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| 2011 just turned 25 in this photo |
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| Meeting the Mayor Vincent in Washington, DC 2012 just cut my hair too |
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| Summer September 2014-doing a promotion for Viniq Vodka delicious Visit http://www.viniq.com |
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| February 2015-out with the family at the NBA All star events |
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| 2014- I was in Jacksonville, Florida at the time. On my dad's friends motorcycle lol! |
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| 2011-at the brand new memorial for Dr. Martin Luther King my mom on the right & my grandmother |
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| 2012-met the Victoria Secret models one of the best memories |
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| My first day starting at Macy's working for the holiday season November 2014 |
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